EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW…
What she can and can’t accomplish in a day…
A month…
And a year…
– Pamela Redmond Satran
The quote above could have been written for me.
Every day, I think of so many things that really can benefit from my time and attention, and when I list them out, it seems reasonable to stretch for more, and then a little more, and then even more…
And it’s almost universally too much.
So, for the rest of this year, which has presented me at least a mountain range of things to do in addition to the things I was already doing (and made some things that had consumed a great deal of my energy suddenly irrelevant), I am going to shift my focus and make my first steps toward acquiring some vital information…
I need to learn where my personal limits are:
What can I accomplish in an hour?
What can I accomplish in a day?
What can I accomplish in a week?
What can I accomplish in a month?
What can I accomplish in a season?
What can I accomplish in a year?
But those questions feel like I’m asking myself “how much can I squeeze in?” And, reading that list up there, I feel the same old tension, the same slight edge of panic that I will never get to it all, or be doing enough.
I think that’s where the problem is. Looking at it this way puts me in checklist mode. I need to tip my head, look at it sideways, upside down, maybe even through funhouse mirrors, binoculars, microscopes, 3D glasses, or stained glass…
I need a different angle, and new shadings.
And so the noodling begins…
I need to see not how much I can get done, but to figure out what is most important to get done:
For myself
For my children
For our animal companions
For our home
For my wider circle of family and friends
For professional development
For others
Aha! Now I think I’m on to something. There’s kind of an order here – maybe the beginnings of a priority list?
My next post will deal with just this – how to set newer and saner priorities. Look for it at the end of the week, in this space!
I really hope you can figure out what works best for you!
Thanks, Fallon!
I do seem to be on the right track – or at least a better one than I’ve been on for the last few years. I’ll keep on fine-tuning and adapting, and I think I will find that saner but still productive place.
I think I’m finally on to something. One category per block, three things per category. Two days off from blocking, and two half days. No more than six working blocks a day.
Seems to be my happy place, at the moment.
I’m making progress on that!
What you’re saying reminds me of the days I had an accomplishment book. I got so overwhelmed by what I didn’t do that I never celebrated what I did do. So for a while, I listed all my wins for a given day. But slowly it reverted to a checklist. From there, I went into militant mode and scheduled the larger part of my day (7am to 4pm) by 15-minute chunks. But as I fell behind schedule I started to drown in despair as I failed to meet my timelines. Right now I have a hierarchy of priorities in which I try and tack my to do-s. Though, the feeling of not getting enough dones eats at me.
Basically, I’m wishing you luck. I’m wishing you success in finding the right balance for you. And I am letting you know, keep at it no matter what happens. If you outgrow systems or need to revisit old/create new ones. Whatever it is, be good to you.
Hi, Gloria!
I so know that feeling of overwhelm. Since Jim died (maybe before, when he got sick, or even earlier, when he started his business), there’s been a tremendous amount of of things to do. At first, I thought I could do them all, or that I should. And maybe I can, but not all at once.
I’ve had to accept that I can only do so much, and that that’s going to be far less than I want it to be. I’m trying to learn to be okay with that and celebrate the things I do. I’ve been blocking the day into two hour chunks and only schedule three things per block. If I finish them, I don’t move ahead; I keep the time for myself.
If I don’t get any of these things done, it’s okay. Sometimes life works in a different way – dogs need to be walked, kids need to be talked to, and the house always needs all kinds of things.
And sometimes I just need to do something like yesterday, when I decided to go with Lise to a home decor consignment shop more or less on a whim.
Jim used to have a motto. “Eat dessert first.”
I’m learning.
I hope you will, too, and that you’ll be good to you, as well.
I’ve gotten pretty good at being good to me over the last several years (and especially this last one!)
I tend to always think I can (and often SHOULD) do more than is remotely feasible.
I’m learning to relax more, and that the desire to play Plague Inc. or Cake Mania usually means I need to simmer without putting anything else in my brain or on my to-do list.
Ta-das sprinkled in help, too, especially when what I did was productive, but not what I planned to do
No militancy for me. I’m mostly paying attention to how I function best, so I can use it to my advantage.